How to deal with a 2 yrs old boy?

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Permalink Reply by RP Mom on March 24, 2009 at 4:12pm

I have there!! My kids are 20 months apart and my two year old had a tough time adjusting to his new little sibling!! Boy were there days he tested me!!! What I finally figured out was that my 2 year old was just looking for attention. He was jealous of the baby. I made sure that each day I spent time with him alone, this is great to do when the baby is sleeping. Is there a certain toy or book that is your 2 years olds favorite? Spend that time with him. Also, when my husband came home from work he made it a point to go to my 2 year old first. Made my 2 year old feel special. We also started doing things alone with my older one on the weekends -- special Mommy time and special Daddy time without the baby. My son got a kick out of just going to the food store with me alone! Hang in there!! I promise it does get easier!!

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Permalink Reply by Nicole on March 24, 2009 at 6:25pm

Hang in there. I have three boys (4,3, and 17 months) with one on the way in April. It's hectic, but I love them and try each day to do the right things with them. It would be impossible not to lose your patience every once in a while and the two's are probably the most trying periods. Spend quality time with each one of them as you can. My sons all love me to read to them and they will sit there altogether and listen as I read. It's a bonding time for us all.

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Permalink Reply by Debby on March 25, 2009 at 10:36am

I felt the same way when I had my youngest. The truth is you don't but you have to make yourself slow down and give him kind detailed instructions and well, don't tell him to do anything he can't do in 30 seconds or less.

Things Like
"Don't touch the baby" should be "come help mommy". Keep all your instructions positive.

You should also make time to read to him alone for 20 minutes a day and play with him without giving instructions (child led if he's doing nice actions) for 5 minutes a day.

I outlined this in a blog a few years ago.

http://debbysewninwesttulsa.blogspot.com/2007/06/parent-child-inter...

This will help you interact with him in a positive way. Then you take those skills and carry them out through out the day and with your baby and with your SO then with the rest of the family.

It really is nice to have nice things to say, talk to family as if you're really listening to them and give them positive feed back.

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Permalink Reply by tania on March 25, 2009 at 6:28pm

I have a two year old and I am pregnant, due July 1st. I want to give my son all the attention in the world and once I have my baby I feel like I will be in limbo. If my 2yr. old cries for me and then my newborn cries for me who am I going to attend to 1st. It will have to be my 2 year old first because he will remember and he will feel hurt and feel left out. The best way to deal with your 2 year old while you have your newborn is treat him like you did when it was just him.

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Permalink Reply by Theresa on March 25, 2009 at 9:21pm

Okay 1st off it's very difficult to split your time between a 2month old and a 2 yr old. Babies need ALOT off attention as you well know. There's no way you can treat your 2 yr olthe xact same way as if he was still the only child. That's illogical because he's NOT an only child. You have to as a parent learn to intergrate the two children together.Yes it's going to be very frustrating and emotional.But from experience please dont ignore either child.Do your best that's all anyone can ask.Parents don't give birth knowing exactly how to be a mother.It's intinct and role models.So just breath have faith and take it one day at a time ...Just remember, INVOLVE your oldest child.If they cry at the same time pick up the 2 month old while your dealing with the 2 yr old. It doesn't always have to be one or the other.

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Permalink Reply by Brenda Nixon on March 26, 2009 at 6:06am

Yes, it takes oodles of patience with young children -- well, all children of all ages. It is good that you can express your feelings because sometimes that is all it takes to help relieve the stress -- talk it out.

Is it possible for you to take some time, when the two are napping, to cozy up with a book and cup of coffee and relax? You need to nurture yourself, too. There are many good books you can check out of your public library.

I remember those frazzled days when my two daughters had so many demands on my time that I didn't even get to brush my teeth or look at myself in the mirror. Half the day was over before I got to do anything for myself. But, that is par for the course with tykes. Believe me, this too shall pass and soon your two little ones will be teenagers and out of the house. Then you'll have to practice patience in the teen years, but at least you will have some time alone to nurture yourself and your girlfriend relationships.

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Permalink Reply by sugar mama on March 26, 2009 at 10:18am

pick just three things to focus on at a time. ie; not throwing food on the floor, going night night with one story and brushing teeth. then you nail those (abt. three weeks) and pick another three. life will seem so much more manageable. xo sugar mama

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Permalink Reply by Lucinda on April 27, 2009 at 11:36pm

Ok my best bet is to let the baby run around the house for a bit, try to turn on a cartoon that they like, are my be taking him to the park, so he can use up his energy, so when you get to the house he will take a nap for you, look it is not that hard, I babysat a 3mon, and a 17month little girl, all I did was I close all the doors in the house, so she won't touch nothing crazy, and then I blocked the kitchen with the stroller, so she can't go in there, they will notice that they don't have much to do, and they will soon take a nap and the baby, I put him in his car sit, and rocked him back and forth, and then he will go to sleep, and then you have the day to your self until they wake up, it was not to hard for me, just keep trying different things, and see what works for you and the kids.

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Permalink Reply by Ms. Monica on April 28, 2009 at 8:23pm

My son is 2 almost three. I felt aggravated when he was just one and he was at that stage where it seemed as if he did everything to make me pull my hair out. Its a tough stage. But one thing that helped me was to step back and think about what he did or is doing and why? Is it something that is going to cause him danger and do I need to discipline him right now? Should I explain why its dangerous and is he going to understand at this time? Is he mad because he wants something he can't have? Is he hungry, sleepy? Do I need to discipline for this or is this just something that is just a mistake? Like spilling something or dropping and breaking objects. When you loose patients you might find yourself just disciplining your child because you can and you are mad. But being my first child i figured it out very quickly that children don't do what you want them to when you want them to just because you said so. And take a step back and thinking a little about the situation helps. And then of course when you figure it out and you create a plan of action be consistent. Children like schedules believe it or not. At least loose schedules. And then of course with age as you continue to be consistent they calm down a lot also. My son is much calmer just a year later then he was a year ago. But BE CONSISTENT! MEAN WHAT YOU SAY. DON"T SAY WHAT YOU AREN"T PLANNING TO DO! FOLLOW THRU! Even if it takes 10 times, even if it take 20. After that give him a nap. And try again later. LOL.

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Permalink Reply by melanie on May 20, 2009 at 11:36am

first off there is a HUGE difference between being a mom and being a babysitter there is also a big difference between a 17month old and a two year old when you have kids there are no days to yourself in that two /three hour nap time if you are lucky enough to get both to sleep that is when you have to catch up on house work, or if you want to spoil yourself, your own sleep cause unlike the sitter the mom of a 2 month old and a 2year old doesn't get much sleep at night
Lucinda said:

Ok my best bet is to let the baby run around the house for a bit, try to turn on a cartoon that they like, are my be taking him to the park, so he can use up his energy, so when you get to the house he will take a nap for you, look it is not that hard, I babysat a 3mon, and a 17month little girl, all I did was I close all the doors in the house, so she won't touch nothing crazy, and then I blocked the kitchen with the stroller, so she can't go in there, they will notice that they don't have much to do, and they will soon take a nap and the baby, I put him in his car sit, and rocked him back and forth, and then he will go to sleep, and then you have the day to your self until they wake up, it was not to hard for me, just keep trying different things, and see what works for you and the kids.

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Permalink Reply by melanie on May 20, 2009 at 11:46am

i understand how you feel I'm in the same boat my son just turned two on Sunday and my daughter will be 3months on the 22 sometimes i have to put the baby in one room and the toddler in another and just go outside for a couple minutes to get my head straight again sometimes my aunt had four kids and always said your not a mom until you've had more than one since I've had my baby i understand what she means

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