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Is timeout effective?
i tried it and maybe my kids are too quick for me but it occured to them, "hey i dont have to actually sit here... ruuuuuun!" it is funny but when youve had a bad day it can really get to you. Have i lost control orarethey just being boys?
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Manuela Hammel on -
Once the boys have left the corner you have lost control. I've used time out for both my children and it always worked for me. I add a discussion to the time out first explaining what was done that was wrong, why it was wrong, what could have been done instead and then -- ask my daughter how much time in the corner would be appropriate. When an apology letter is in order, she writes one too. The important thing is that you get your boys to sense that you mean business. Be consistant first off. If the behavior isn't good for 1 it can't be for the others either. Punishment doesn't necessarily have to fit the crime, but does have to fit the age, about 1 minute per age year. My youngest asked if she could decorate her corner. So I typed up a poem and taped it to the wall....."When my mood is tart and sour - I come here to think for what seems like an hour". She's rarely had more than 5 minutes at a time which is usually what it took for me and for her to calm down so that a discussion about what happened is meaningful. Now that she's 9, the poem no longer hangs there (hasn't since she started school - that would be embarassing for when friends come over). The discussion is important afterwards because without a lesson actually being learned, the punishment becomes nothing short of a pause in the fun of being naughty. You may also want to follow this up with some clean up time and then a hug to let them know that you still love them very much, even though they weren't their best that day.
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Permalink Reply by Eden on -
My kids actually like time out about 80% of the time so it's not the world's most effective deterrent for me. The rule is they have to sit in the seat and I stay right near them. If they get up more than once (first time is a warning), they get more time (30 seconds). It keeps them sitting pretty well. Also when I introduced timeouts, I kept hold of their upper legs to keep them in the seat and just repeated "sit in the seat" when they would try to get up. My daughter (5) will sit but my son (3) sometimes wants to get up. I also use the digital timer on the oven so they will sit there & watch the timer tick down.
You could try one of those timeout bears w/ a built in timer or a funny timer (I've seen pigs, frogs, etc.) that they can focus on.
IMO: timeout is about refocusing and calming down. If you give the kids a specific focus, it might help keep them in place. That's not to say they won't run but it's worth a shot.
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Permalink Reply by Vicki Hancock on -
Timeouts never worked for my boys. But then again, not too much of anything worked for my boys. Had a had a boy first, I would have never had any more kids, lol. Boys are tough.
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Permalink Reply by saschab on -
It really depends on the child's personality. My son was like your kids, and the pediatrician would help me come up with creative time outs, like in the car seat in the car, with me just out of view in the blind spot but still there to make sure he stayed safe. I never had any problems like that with my oldest, my daughter.
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Permalink Reply by Rebecca D on -
Time out has never worked for me unless I made them sit for hours at a time and I don't like doing that. I have found other things that work better for my kids but everyone is different in how they react to different punishments.
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