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Our story about the mom who used the same fertility doc as the octuplets mom created some heat in the comments.

http://www.momlogic.com/2009/02/i_used_octuplet_moms_ivf_docto.php

MolliBuckeye says "I’ll say it again: STOP messing with Nature. Work to change adoption laws. Understand that some people can not conceive naturally, and for those people the only option should be adoption. If you choose to wait until later in life to have children, that is a risk you take. Please stop saying things like “it is Gods will” when speaking of IVF and other fertility treatments. If you believe and have fertility issues, then it was Gods will for you to adopt and give a loving home to an orphan. Give me a break people!"

Does she have a point or is she just closed minded?

Tags: fertility, ivf, octuplets

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One of the biggest problems I have with IVF is how many women put off having children during the peak of our child bearing years and then get really upset that they can't conceive after they are 35. They go to a doctor to get pregnant because they put it off so long and no longer can get pregnant. This in turn ups health risk hugely and inserts other complications that aren't strictly medical. I've heard so many late in life mothers who complain about their low energy level and how they have a hard time keeping up with a child because they aren't young anymore. Also in the cases of the women having kids after 45 you put your child at a higher risk of being an orphan before they reach adulthood. I also think that too many doctor way more in for their financial gain than to their Hippocratic Oath. I'm pro-choice but I'm not terribly fond of IVF mostly because so much irresponsibility surrounds it and there are so many children in the world without a home and in need of adoption.
I commend so many couples out there who either WAITED to marry the right person, or who spend the time nurturing their relationship in order to be able to sustain a happy, healthy environment for potential kids. Sometimes this means being career-focused, travel-focused, whatever. Regardless, you can't always quantify "when you're ready." IVF has been invaluable, in my opinion, for those parents who did the work that every good parent should do. Sometimes that means doing it on their own time. :)
I don't think IVF is wrong at all. I do think that the adoption process is a lot more complicated than it should be. Why adopt when it's cheaper and easier for me to just have a baby of my own? There needs to be some serious changes there.
I have been through IVF.

2 years before I fell pregnant with my 13 year old I was told I most likely would not be able to have children. I won't go into all of the medical reasons here, but it was a miracle that I became pregnant with my son. Unfortunately the relationship with his father did not work out and I am since married to a wonderful man. We tried for 3 years to get pregnant on our own, to no avail. So we did go the IVF route. It worked and I have been blessed with 2 more amazing children. I think that if you can afford to pay for IVF treatments (a portion of ours was covered by insurance) and can afford to raise these children in a stable, happy home without expecting handouts from everyone then there should not be a problem. However I do believe that no more than 2 or 3 embryo's should be implanted at a time. I feel that there is something a little shady about the doctor mentioned in the article. If IVF did not work for us, we would have looked at adoption and had discussed that as an option.
It is hard for me to read some of the comments that people have about using fertility treatments to get pregnant and ultimately have children. I had tried for nearly three years to conceive. After many frustrating and heartbreaking months my husband and I turned to fertility treatments. We were informed the risks and costs involved. We were also told of the dangers to both mother and baby if there were many multiples and how we might have to make difficult choices. At the time I was only 25 years old. We were ineligible to adopt in many foreign countries because of the age. With open adoptions here in the states there is also concern of mothers taking advantage of adoptive parents and then changing their mind. I do know many people that were able to get children and are more than happy with the outcome. However, with the age that I was and our situation my husband and I turned to IVF. After a crazy amount of tests, drugs and money we found out that we were going to have a baby. I think that for people that don't have to face the idea of going childless it is easy to say let 'nature' take it's course. I on the other hand feel that I am the most 'natural' mother my children could have. Meaning, I was meant to be their mother and to carry them for 9 months. I think that adoption is a true blessing, but my money is on science. I have two beautiful children because of it.

I think that science in the wrong hands can be dangerous and irresponsible. When mentioning "Gods will" It is my belief that the good lord gave me a loving husband and family to support my choice to go ahead with fertility treatments. I'm a great, responsible mother and am thankful for the science of having babies. Adoption is a great option, however at that place in my life wasn't viable for my situation. I am currently 29 years old and have two children that are happy and healthy. Tell me that we should sit back and let 'Nature' take over. Because as I see it, 'Nature' doesn't call for drugs for cancer, diabetes, or other medical anomalies. What is the cut-off for the 'Nature' argument?

I didn't put off having children for my career, or even for financial reasons. I was and am married with both of us having stable careers. I just had some little medical glitch that if without the science of things, "Nature" would have deemed me childless.
I wanted to second Rayna's post--my husband and I have been trying to conceive for almost 3 years as well, and we started when I was 26 and he was 29, so I don't think by any stretch of the imagination that could be called waiting till we were too old! We are both very healthy, very financially stable and responsible, have a wonderful, loving relationship, and since we first met, we have dreamed of becoming parents together. I cannot believe that it is God's will that we not become parents. We have sought fertility treatments, but unfortunately our one round of IVF ended in pregnancy loss, which was heartbreaking. IVF is not in any way an easy thing to go thru, as it involves surgery, many many shots, and much discomfort that I never imagined would be required in order to make a baby with my husband. However, we do plan to try IVF again, but currently are pursuing domestic open adoption because we feel strongly about welcoming a child who's already here into our family. We think it will be a beautiful thing to have both adopted and biological children in our family. While adoption will make us parents, and we will be absolutely thrilled at that gift, I do not want to give up on getting to experience pregnancy and bringing a child into the world who is half my husband, half me. I think this is an utterly natural urge that any mother should be able to understand. As for cost, insurance does not cover any IVF for us (it's very rare for insurance to cover this, so anyone who has this coverage should feel very lucky!), so adoption is actually cheaper. Either path is quite expensive, but we want to be parents more than anything else in the world, this is absolutely our top priority, and so to us, it's worth it. And I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
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