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MY HUSBAND WAS DIAGNOSED BACK IN JULY ON THE 15th WITH CANCER ITS BEEN A LONG HAUL IN SUCH A SHORT TIME.HE PASSED AWAY CHRISTMAS EVE.HE WENT THROUGH RADIATION 10 TREATMENTS ,THEN HE HAD THE LARGE DOSE OF RADIATION USING THE HALO.THEN STARTED THE CHEMO EVERY 2 WEEKS HE WOULD GO IN GET PREPED FOR THE CHEMO WITH ANTINAUSIA MEDS WE WOULD SIT FOR HOURS SOMETIMES UP TO 6 OR 7 HOURS JUST GETTING PREPED FOR THE CHEMO .THEN THEY WOULD START THE CHEMO HE WOULD CARRY A POUCH WITH THE MEDS HOME THEN THE NEXT DAY WE WOULD DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN.GO BACK GET PREPED WEAR IT HOME AGAIN .HE WAS TO DO THIS FOR 6 MONTHS.HE COULD HAVE MADE IT THROUGH THE CHEMO BUT HE QUIT EATING LOST HIS APPETITE AFRAID IT WOULD MAKE HIM SICKAND IT USUALLY DID.HE LOST SO MUCH WEIGHT .FOR OVER 3 MONTHS HE MAY HAVE HAD A CUP OF FOOD AND MOST OF IT CAME BACK UP.HE STARTED OUT AT 215 LBS BY THE TIME HE WENT TO BE WITH THE LORD HE WAS PROBABLY 100LBS. I THINK ALL THE TIME IF I COULD HAVE ONLY MADE HIM EAT MAYBE HE'D STILL BE HERE .MAYBE IF I HAD TRIED HARDER WOULD IT HAVE MADE A DIFERANCE WHAT DO YOU THINK?? I WONDER

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Dear Johnnie, my sincere sympathy for your recent loss. I worked as an oncology social worker for 15 years. Although I completely understand why you might be looking for things you could have done differently to deal with the pain of your loss, you probably already know that there is nothing more you could have done to prevent the disease from taking your husband. This is a terrible and difficult thing to deal with. Some people find it helpful to talk with other people going through a similar loss, or just talking about it with a bereavement counselor. It really can help. I would recommend finding a grief support group or bereavement counselor to help you through this difficult time. The American Cancer Society usually has listings you can access in your community. Be patient with yourself. Hope that helps a bit.
thank you so much .you are right i know the cancer was bad we both knew we could'nt beat it but it was like he just gave up and i feel like i let him i should have tried harder maybe there was something i could have said or done to make him eat .he refused to have a tube .i should have tried harder to get him to have the feeding tube put in. maybewe would have had alittle more time together.
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