Teen Dating Safety
How do you make sure your teens are safe when they go out on dates? Do you enforce a curfew or make them check in during the date?
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Permalink Reply by David Estep on -
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Permalink Reply by jay edmonton on -
Why are teens out on dates in the first place? Teens are not mentally, emotionally, or physically ready for the demands of dating. The way the economy and the world is today, teens should be focused on the life that is to come. They should be studying or voluteering or doing things that will enhance their lives. In a few short years, teens will either have the momentum (grades and desire) to go on to further education, or they won't. If they don't, they will (hopefully) enter into the workforce. If a parent, truly loves their children and wants the best for them (a life that will be able to provide, freedom, expression, and enough money to live well), then I don't think dating fits into the picture. Dating allows the mental focus that should be on education to be distracted. Teens "in love" lose interest in anything but the object of their feelings. This doesn't allow for personal growth and life experience. The years where the most learning is able (teens have a youthful brain like a sponge and it is easiest to learn and retain information at a young age), is being thwarted. Society is the way that it is because a majority of the people living in it put high priorities on dating and love relationships. So, how to make your teens safe? Teens are not equipped to date, mentally, emotionally or physically. There is no "safe" way for a teen to date. If it's assumed that out with friends is safe? You can count on peer pressure of one doign something that the other does not feel comfortable with. Or "friends" (not really friends at all), egging them on to do things they're not comfortable with. Mistakes in judgement can be expected. For example, how far to let him go, or how far should he go with her? What is safe? Teens are not equipped to make that judgement (most adults aren't either!). Date rape is far too common among teens. Teen alcholism and drug use is higher than ever before! A combination of peer pressure, and low-self esteem (caving in to peer pressure, promiscuity, etc) can prove to be a trip to the dark side, from which the teen may never recover. Teens are big in stature, and look like mini adults, but they are not. Even the most mature teen is just that, a teen, not an adult. Teen pregnancy, and STD are rampant. Even if a teen manages time and responsibilities (study, homework, chores), and the two teens are truly in "love," and having a beautiful and honest relationship, people change as they grow up and get more knowledge. And getting together, pairing up and mating at a young age is where at least 1/2 of married couples are today -- just waiting for their kids to grow up and leave the house so they can get a divorce. Marriages at a young age are destined for failure, and failure at 40 years old (when the kids are grown and gone), is a hard time to restart life, or to go back to school and get that education that was out of reach because of the bills and the kids and the lack of time. Sure, anything can happen, and this is in no way meant to be a negative outlook on life, love or relationships. This is just meant to think-through.. really.. WHY is it so critically important for TEENS to date? Question in return: Is it the parent who is under TEEN pressure to allow the teen to get out there and date? If a parent is insecure about letting the teen out, either the teen is not trustworty, or the environment isn't. If the world were a perfect place, and the teen could be "trusted," then there is NO NEED for a curfew, and no need to have to make sure they're safe. So, if you have to put up all the safety nets and curfews... is the teen ready to date?
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