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Well, my four year old daughter just came to me tonight telling me her babysitter doesn't push her on our swing because she is not a baby but she'll push her younger brother because he "is" a baby ( he's two)!!! I'm sooo floored!! Not only that but Hannah is telling me that all the babysitter does is watch her "boring " shows on t.v and does not play with them!! I have been pretty upset with this babysitter to begin with! She leaves dirty diapers laying around (even though I have asked her to put them in the garbage!)! She leaves crumbs and food on the floor and does not even try to clean up!! I pay her good money to look after my two kids! I buy the kids and HER pizza if she's over at supper time!! I really have no idea what to do! We have no other help! Both mine and my hubby's mom have past away! So we have no one to rely to if we want to go out to have mom and dad time!! When I was a babysitter I would pick up after the kids and put away any dishes the kids or myself have used! I would play with the kids and try to make the kids happy! I want the same kind of babysitter that I was!! Is that too much to ask?? Where do you find a good babysitter!!! And to make matters even worse this girl is our neighbor and I'm friends with her Mother!!! Any advise you can give I would appreciate it!!!!

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I never had this problem because I was lucky enough to have family around to watch my kids when I needed them.
The first thing I would do is talk to her. Have you told her what you expect of her? Ask, why she does not play with the children. How old is she?
This is her job! She is not taking this sitting job serious. If she were at a job somewhere else, she would be written up or talked to for not doing what is expected of her. If she don't straighten up, then I would start looking for another one. There is a sight online that you can look for sitters in your area. (or at least there is in mine) Or put an add in your local paper. Make sure if you do look for someone else, you tell them exactly what you expect of them.
Good luck in whatever you do!
Thanks NC Mom!! I think I will talk to her AGAIN!! She is thirteen and I think she only babysits for us! I'm thinking maybe she doesn't know what to do with the kids! I have asked her many times to put the diaper in the garbage and to try to clean up the living room!! I do think she tries to do that! But still there are times we are cleaning up the house for at least an hour when we get home from having a good time out!! Who really wants to clean house after being out?? Thanks again for suggestion! and I do think I will try talking to her again!!
referrals from Friends and try, www.care.com, it is a sitter service for your area. good luck
Hi there! Thought I'd try to comment on your question. Unfortunately, most of the teenagers that are of babysitting age nowadays, have a whole different concept of "babysitting". I hate to say it, but the young teens today want the money, but not the responsibility. What I have found (I'm a grandmother now myself) is that you have to be specific with them, even so much as making a list, of what you want them to do. When you are looking at a sitter, sit down with them and explain to them EXACTLY what they need to be doing to 'earn' their money. Including spending time playing with the children. It sounds like it's something that they should already know, but unfortunately, kids are being raised in a whole different fashion that what your generation is used too. I used to be in managment and worked with alot of young adults........talk about a babysitting job! lol. They didn't want to do anymore than what was necessary, but often complained about the pay! You might try checking with an agency in your town that can direct you to teens in your area who have taken babysitting classes? I wish you lot's of luck. I babysit my own 2 grandchildren because of the same situation, good daycare is hard to find!
you can find a good sitter at your local high school and the teachers can give recommendations.
I would approach the mother first. I would suggest that you are going to find another sitter who has been trained to do things in "baby sitting" or something offered by your local hospital or YWCA. Once your friend knows you're looking for a more responsible sitter then maybe she will get the point and make sure her daughter is being a little lazy.

While you're talking to your friend you might ask her about her daughters habits of leaving things laying around. Perhaps the two of you could come up with some reinforcements.

If you are set on giving your sitter another chance then make a schedule for her to follow with extra money for all the things she actually does and deductions for tasks not done. If you lower what you pay her and explain exactly why she will get the point.
First of all, I don't think you're asking too much. When I hire a sitter, I expect her to be warm and loving with my children, to engage them in fun activities, to keep them safe, and to clean up after herself and the children. It is pretty difficult to try to discuss stuff like this with a current sitter, in terms of changing what they already to-- I've tried this in the past, and the sitter has taken offense. So now what I do is to put all my expectations on the table before they start. And the more specific the better! As for your current sitter, I understand that her mom is a friend, but honestly, I wouldn't use her any more. If her mom asks why you're not hiring her, I'd say something about how you want to use older sitters who can do more with your kids, or something like that.

As for where to find sitters, have you ever tried any sitter sites online? I've had great luck with Care.com. The site is super easy to use and has lots of great articles and tips. They have a huge database of sitters, and you can easily find the ones in your area. They also do background checks (in addition I check references and interview in person). It does cost to join, but I got a discount by using the code CLUBMOM. Well worth the money, imho!

Best of luck to you-- honestly, there are great sitters out there. Don't settle for the bad ones!!!
Thanks so much for your reply Margot!! We are trying to find a new babysitter! I totally agree with you it is harder to change the expectations of the babysitter we already have. I called the Mother and told her what my daughter has told me . She said" that is no big deal".The last time we had this babysitter I talked to her ( after talking to her mom) and asked her if she played with the kids she said "yes". When we got home I asked my son if she played with him not expecting an answer as he's only two!(she was only looking after my son that time.)my daughter pipes up "well she better not have as she doesn't play with me"!!! This is the second time she has made a comment to me now so it's time to start looking!!! The mother said that if I feel I can't resolve this with her daughter then I should find another. So that is exactly what I'm doing. I have looked up this site you mentioned ( I believe) and right now I'm not willing to spend money to join. I'm going to ask around first. I am very stressed over this whole situation. It's my time out and I treasure that time!! I'm not sure if you are a home mom but if you are you would understand! Well wish me luck trying to find "a good reliable" babysitter. And thanks again for the advice!!! Hope this makes sense to you!!

Margot said:
First of all, I don't think you're asking too much. When I hire a sitter, I expect her to be warm and loving with my children, to engage them in fun activities, to keep them safe, and to clean up after herself and the children. It is pretty difficult to try to discuss stuff like this with a current sitter, in terms of changing what they already to-- I've tried this in the past, and the sitter has taken offense. So now what I do is to put all my expectations on the table before they start. And the more specific the better! As for your current sitter, I understand that her mom is a friend, but honestly, I wouldn't use her any more. If her mom asks why you're not hiring her, I'd say something about how you want to use older sitters who can do more with your kids, or something like that.
As for where to find sitters, have you ever tried any sitter sites online? I've had great luck with Care.com. The site is super easy to use and has lots of great articles and tips. They have a huge database of sitters, and you can easily find the ones in your area. They also do background checks (in addition I check references and interview in person). It does cost to join, but I got a discount by using the code CLUBMOM. Well worth the money, imho!
Best of luck to you-- honestly, there are great sitters out there. Don't settle for the bad ones!!!
Look into the YMCA or local community centers. Most offer a babysitting class for teens and pre-teens. You can probably get a list of good, qualified babysitters. OR... go to your local high school and talk to the Home Ec teacher. Tell her what you're looking for and she will undoubtedly know of some girls who fit the bill. When I was 15 I actually got a daily after school babysitting job that way! My Home Ec teacher referred me. My other suggestion is to start a co-op with other moms who are in the same position. You babysit for them and they return the favor. Good luck!!
i woud tell the girl she is not doing to well of a job and if she wants to continue working for u she has to start acting like a real babysitter

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