Struggling Mom

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Permalink Reply by T. Suzanne Eller on February 6, 2009 at 5:18pm

A great book is written by Kevin Lehman and is titled Have a Great Kid by Friday (or something similar). It could really give you some great tips. Another good resource is Sarah Horn's ministry to military spouses. Her website is http://www.sarahorn.com/. Her blog is http://faithatthefront.blogspot.com/ and she has other links for military families at http://www.sarahorn.com/html/links.html.

I hope these are good places to begin.

Suzie

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Permalink Reply by Michelle on February 6, 2009 at 6:20pm

Thanks so much for your responses. Even when you have no "advice" to offer, the words you write mean so much! I am looking into some books and adding them to my amazon orders! I have read some good books... One is called "Parenting by the Book" and the other, "1-2-3 Magic." Both have helped, but I think I need to read them again!

You are right about taking care of yourself. I remember struggling after I had my daughter when a good friend sent me a package... It was nothing for the baby at all. It was random samplings from "Bath and Body Works." It was the nicest thing she could have done. Sometimes you need a reminder (or even a push) to realize you have to do for yourself so you can do for others.

Maybe I need to come here more often...lol. Thanks again, ladies!

Michelle

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Permalink Reply by Angela Marion {pricousins} on February 6, 2009 at 7:35pm

I am a single mom and I go through the same thing. My daughter has ADHD and is 9. My son is 12, soon to be 13.

The only thing I can say is to be consistent, and enforce what you say, or they will try to get away with anything.

I will keep you in my prayers,

Hugs,
Angie
Pricousins

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Permalink Reply by Mary on February 6, 2009 at 9:33pm

My advice is to maybe try soothing and calm things with them. You can set the mood to your household. Maybe share 30 minutes or so with each child...just one on one time wiht a board game or whatnot. Try a calming activity like yoga that you all can do...those videos are everywhere. Just start a routine with them when you are all home and you will see a difference. Structure is everything when it comes to calming chaos. I know....as a mom it seems that we dont have time for all the things we want to do in a day. Muchless in the 6 hours from 3pm to 9pm afterschool when we are supposed to be getting dinner done, bathing the kids and whatnot...but maybe let them entertain themselves in their own little chaos while your cooking and after dinner let that be a time you guys do something together.

I love the show Nanny 911 and SuperNanny. It gives so many good ideas and it also shows me that there are more out of control kiddos out there other than my own and also Mothers on the brink of pulling their hair out about what to do.
Those ladies seem to have the simplest solutions to what seems impossible situations. Now, who knows if all that lasts after the show....ahh the glamour of television. But there are great ideas to be used and how to deal with situations we might not know how to face being first hand with it.

ADHD can be no joke when it comes to settling your kiddo. You just have to find their niche. My nephew is ADHD and his thing now that he's 17 is electronics. Before it was taking things apart... Had I only thought to get him an erector set or those build it yourself electronics kits.

Anyhow, I hope this helps, this is what we're here for as moms right? ;)

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Permalink Reply by Julie Albin on February 10, 2009 at 3:26pm

When my daughters were young, I felt frustrated and alone because my husband had a job that demanded a lot of his time (he often worked until 10 p.m.). I felt like a lot of my life was spent waiting for my husband to come home and give me a break. Eventually, I realized that my expectations, not my husband's work shedule, were robbing me of my joy.

I stopped waiting and started living by finding moms to trade childcare with so I could have a break. I also planned field trips with friends whose husbands also worked late and took a few road trips to see the Wiggles in concert and several children's plays.

You mentioned that it's difficult to take your children places. If you are looking for practical and easy-to-remember advice to help when you are in public, a list of rhymes I call upon regularly to help when parenting my children can be found by clicking on the link below.

Guiding Children in the Way they Should Go

My favorite rhymes are "When kids go berserk, put them to work." and "Behave in the store or we go to one more."

I hope this helps.

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