Radical Parenting

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Comment by Jennifer on January 26, 2009 at 10:12am

Grown up Digital: A must read book for anyone dealing with teens http://connectwithyourteens.blogspot.com/2009/01/grown-up-digital-must-read-book-for.html

Comment by Jennifer on January 11, 2009 at 11:35am

I want to let everyone know about a great website for teens called Hey Josh, by a great entertaining youth leader Josh Ship. Read all about it at:
Hey Josh - Advice, entertainment and community website for teens
It is also great for parents of teens to keep up with what is going on with them.

Comment by Jennifer on January 10, 2009 at 6:12pm

Hi everyone. I write a blog very relevant to the topic of this group. It is called "Connect with your teens through Pop Culture and Technology". I'm looking forward to discussions here.

Comment by Lindsey on December 22, 2008 at 3:27pm

I was a teen not so long ago. I have seen a lot and can now look back and see everything my mom has ever said to me and really understand it. I have always had a great relationship with my mom, i just wanted to do what i wanted to do. But i really believe its who you hang out. I see that now. Just like my mom always told me. I had always said i am strong enough to do what i want and know right from wrong. But if i never put myself in those situations then i would not have anything to worry about.

Comment by Mary on December 9, 2008 at 9:20pm

Mine aren't really issues. My daughter is 14. We are super close. Lately she's become more reclusive to her room (I guess that's a normal teen thing, I did that as well). If I'm in her space too much she lets me know...when I back off and give more attention to my 7 year old son all of the sudden I love him more than I love her (according to her).
I'm involved in her interests and support anything she wants to become interested in (theater mostly). She's not of the sporty type which really throws me because that's what my life as a teen was all about. She's more of an intellect, book addict, life studier. She loves to write. So I am adapting myself to things she likes.

I just want her to be able to confide in me...I feel she vents in her stories (which are at times a tad dark) and I feel the need to do....something to get in touch more with her.

We go out shopping or to a movie, just her and I, to attain more bonding time. I am constantly striking up conversation just to get in her world for a while and see what's up. I don't know.

Ya think I'm just dealing with typical teenage actions or am I missing something here?

Comment by Holly on October 27, 2008 at 1:30pm

Uuummm...not writing to complain, just wanted to add my voice to the mix. Maybe what I am about to say will make me sound like a bad parent or lazy or lax, but I don't think so.
My youngest and I, she is 17, have a really good relationship. Seriously! Despite some heavy things happening in the last three years or so.
We talk, openly about everything, and I DO mean everything. No subject she might want to talk about is taboo.
I am not going to make her get perfect grades, I went back to school when I was 27...I have no room to talk about bad grades. Instead, I want her to try her best, and not give up on something she really believes she can do. All she has to do is try.
I am not one of those parents who won't let her experiment with her look. She wants to dye her hair blue? Shave half of it off? Get a tattoo? I have one, btw.
I don't tell her she is wrong to feel a certian way and she shouldn't say things "like that'. She is a human being and entitled to her feelings and should not be made to feel like she is a bad person.
She knows where the "stupid line " is. She knows there are consiquences. I never make the punishment harsher than the crime, and she doesn't get in to trouble at ALL most of the time because she chooses to be good. She has watched me struggle as a single parent, she wants better for herself.
I am easy to talk to and have a "don't ask, don't tell" policy with her friends. Don't get me wrong, if one of them comes to me with something serious, I would tell them to talk to mom and dad. I have had phone calls in the middle of the night from distraught teenagers. They can come here, it is a safe place, they just have to make sure they call someone to tell them they are here and safe.
I let her make her mistakes, and let her learn from them. I allow her to come to her own comclusions.
I am not perfect,
I am a parent struggling with a potentially crippling disease, and have raised her alone for most of her life. She now has a father, he is not her blood father, but he IS dad, and she is learning balance and responsibility from us both.
Ok, I have a bad habit of rambling...so this is me and my teen.
Cheers to all.
H

Comment by Mia, Sophisticated Tree hugger. Resident book worm. on October 21, 2008 at 1:35pm

hi!
I thought I would join as I am 12, 13 in dec.
( Just to make it clear I am English!! )

Now I know allot of mums and dads who think kids my age should like town and shopping that I should have a boy friend by now ( ?? ) Well I admit, a trip to the shops isn't tooo bad once and a while but I'm not obsessed with it like some girls who go to my school. I enjoy going on the computer, reading fantasy, drawing or practicing my guitar, rather than putting on make up or flirting with a boy.

Another point that makes me annoyed is adults complaining children hate reading!!!!! I LOVE reading! I know that my mates do as well! So grown ups out there get this into your mind WE LIKE TO READ! :)

Thank you!

Comment by Paula on October 21, 2008 at 1:14pm

Hello, Just joined up today. You could say Im loosing it with my 13yr old daughter. She is an only child and I just dont really like her personality the past year. I feel like I dont even know her anymore. She is alot like her dad. That is fine, but she forgets she's 13 not 41. She has been lying alot lately. I keep catching her in them and she will change it all around and almost convince you that your nuts and she is innocent. I mean Holy Crap. I just can't handle her no more. She keeps her friends stuff (ex. Left here or borrowed hoodies, shirts, etc,,,) she will lie and say she returned them to find out she really didnt and then will say " I gave that back, that one is so and so's.) Yah, ok, I wasnt born yesterday. I just dont know what to do about this at this point,. She has lost a freind for a while because of one of these not giving an item back stunts. My husband and I reinforced that fact the lying to friends will only cause you to loose them. Things were ok for a short while and now it's back to the same old bull. Has anyone gone through anything similar? If so, how did you handle it. My husband thinks she should just pay the consequences with her lack of trust and honesty with her friends. What about my lack of trust in her? I don't trust her anymore either. Suggestions would be so helpful and appreciated. Thanks for listening to my vent.
P.M.

Comment by Denise Shannon on October 13, 2008 at 10:34am

Hi --
Just joined today. I am just experienceing the whole teen thing with my daughter who recently turned thirteen. It will great to talk to moms who have the same life experiences and outlook that I do.

Denise

Comment by Mary on September 23, 2008 at 7:41pm

Hello. I just joined this group. My youngest is a teenager....a girl. My boys are in the their mid twenties. I will tell you what really worked for my daughter and I...brought us closer together. We started scrapbooking together. When she went to try on her prom dress, I went with her and took my camera and I told her she could try on the most expensive dresses! I photographed all of this, and she made her pages in her album with many photos of her in glamorous dresses. It was so great.

My daughter journalled about her first car, getting her drivers license, etc. We did it together. She is in college now so not as much time for this type of thing, but I just wanted to share this with those of you who have teenage daughters. God bless, Mary

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