asking a fmaily member to pay you?

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Permalink Reply by Tiffany Acuff on March 26, 2009 at 8:42am

If she is using you as a sitter, then she should expect to pay you as a sitter. While we often share childcare among our church family, if we ask one of the teens to sit for us, we always pay them. Are you able to take other jobs while watching her children or are you stuck with watching hers for free and missing other opportunities for pay? That would affect my decision, too...

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Permalink Reply by Christy Tanner on March 26, 2009 at 9:01am

It isn't unheard of to ask a family member to pay for your services, particularly if you are only asking for $10 a day. I understand that it may be awkward asking her to pay you, but if you explain to her that babysitting is a job for you and you need the income, she will most likely be happy to pay you. Also, it may be awkward for her to ask you to babysit because she may know that you won't turn her down, but she may think it is an insult to offer to pay you for your time with her family (I know that may sound odd, but I found a similar situation between a friend of mine and her brother.) She may be happy to pay you, knowing that she isn't taking advantage of your help.

In the end, the worst thing that can happen is that she says she won't pay you. However, I wouldn't worry about that being a problem; it's hard to find someone to watch your children for $10 a day (per child) no matter where you live.

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Permalink Reply by Heather on March 26, 2009 at 8:04pm

Depends. I have cared for family members for free before.. BUT it was not on a regular basis... and they provided their meals... So I got to know my nieces and nephew better in the long run! BUT if it is full time on a regular basis.. I would charge a discounted fee...BUT please let her know before you start the week that you expect to be paid!! ((HUGS)) always hard to talk money with family!

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Permalink Reply by LISA S on March 26, 2009 at 10:18pm

I understand how you feel. It's difficult with family, but you need to say something. If you don't say anything, then when you do sit for her, you'll be thinking, "darn I should've said something, because now some time is passing & I haven't said anything, & I'm not getting paid anything at all." If you do talk to them at least if they can't pay full price, then maybe they could pay a reduced amount. At least if you guys decide to talk, something will come of it!

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Permalink Reply by Sittercity on March 27, 2009 at 4:34pm

Mandy,
Try to talk to your sister about it. $10 a day per child is very reasonable and she should understand that. Does she pay for your meals or gas while you are working?

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Permalink Reply by debralu on March 29, 2009 at 11:26am

When my oldest daughter was a toddler, I had one of my sisters watch her for a few days a week since she didn't have a job at the time. She needed the money and I paid her the same rate that I'd paid my other sitters. When she was able to find a job, I found another sitter.

On the other hand, my mother watched my daughters twice a year for four-day stretches while my husband and I went to buying shows out of state for our business. I offered to pay my mother, but she refused any payment - even for food costs. I always bought her a very nice gift as a thank-you (fruit baskets, skin care packages, flowers & candy, etc.).

In your situation, I think you really need to sit down with your sister and let her know that as much as you love her children, you'd like to be fairly compensated for taking care of them in addition to food/fuel reimbursement. Ask her what she normally pays and offer to do it for 25% less... (or not).

It's too bad that she didn't offer to pay at the beginning, but sometimes people think that they're "blessing you with the opportunity to be with their children".

Good luck!

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Permalink Reply by Tonya on March 29, 2009 at 11:45am

This is a tough call.

On the one hand, you need to make money, but asking favors of family members is quite a common thing, especially when it comes to babysitting. You mention that you will be babysitting over easter break, are we talking days, or just a couple of hours while she's working? If she's expecting you to babysit full days while she's working then you should be being paid for that.

If this were an occasional situation then I wouldn't ask for money, however if it were becoming more and more frequent, I would certainly expect a little something for it. If this is affecting your chance of income in other avenues, then you certainly need to let your sister know this.

My mum would never ever ask or expect to receive money and she looks after my nephew 2 days a week. However whenever I have asked my teenage son to babysit our 2 year old twins for me so I can go out for a couple of hours in the evening, then I've paid him for it.

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