I've spent the past week in California visiting the great staff behind momlogic... and stalking Ellen Degeneres in my spare time...yes stalking Ellen. I was fortunate enough to have front row seats at today's Ellen show and then headed over to see Jay Leno and watch Ellen on her 28th appearance on the Tonight Show.
I have followed Ellen since she first appeared on the Tonight Show and was asked to sit on the infamous couch. That gal even gave me the balls to do stand-up for over two years in Boston. Thanks to Ellen I became a very horrible comedienne, suffered chronic diarrhea before every comedy show and subjected myself to shows in the basements of Chinese restaurants for crowds of about four people...and they were the waiters . Naturally, twelve years later I wanted an opportunity to thank Ellen for these lovely life experiences.
The show featured Lucy Liu, Steve Spangler and Josh Rabin. I have never danced so much in my life!! If you ever are in town, this is a must-do feel good event! Ellen's wife sat directly in front of us and she is such a natural beauty...my husband was drooling. Ellen was commenting about the economy and decided to do something really nice for the audience. She bought us all tickets for tonight's Megamillions....yup a lottery ticket! The best part was, she handed me my ticket personally! Here I was ready to thank this woman for causing me almost three years of comedy anxiety and she hands me a lottery ticket....shame on me! The drawing is tonight and I'm crossing my fingers.
If I win, I'm going to have my people call Ellen's people. I'm going to cook for her and Portia, give her a back massage, rub her feet, clean up after her dogs, redo my kitchen, donate to cancer research, pay off my house, bills and all that horrific credit card debt. I'll get a new coffee maker, a pole for strip aerobics, take the kids to Disney, buy a vintage guitar for my oldest son, and a dirt bike for the little one. The list goes on...thanks to Ellen....
Ellen's appearance on Leno was the icing on the cake. I brought my lottery ticket and attempted to persuade security to have her bless it, but they refused....what gives? So now, I have to wait until the winning numbers are revealed tonight. Will they be mine? Will Ellen save my family from the ailing economy?
Maybe yes, maybe no, but I am grateful for one thing...I had the chance to stand face to face with the kindest, funniest and most positive person on daytime television...and maybe...just maybe those years of hell hole comedy joints Ellen inspired me to do will finally pay off....
Tags: degeneres, ellen, locketti, susannah
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