My mother-in-law is driving me crazy

My mother-in-law has been living in my home (my home office to be exact) for going on 6 months now and my brother-in-law (who lived with us for 3 months last year) arrived in town last night and is staying in our den, on the couch for 13 days.

Having her in my house is like having a 3rd child. She has severe mood swings. She's pouting one minute saying things like "you don't love me anymore" to the kids and I, then the next minute she is humming. I mean, why do you have to hum in my home? Can't you go to my sister-in-law's house and hum?

- I have resigned to the fact that privacy doesn't exist anymore.
- She doesn't contribute financially.. at all.
- She doesn't buy groceries
- She eats our food, the kids snacks, and uses what we buy at the store (laundry detergent, etc) which is really annoying because I want my kids snacks to last more than 3 days!
- She ate most of the halloween candy and eats other 'goodies' we have in the house.
- She turns our air and heat on whatever she wants.
- She doesn't clean.. she straightens then carries on about how she 'cleaned' for me.
- She uses the kids' shampoo for her dogs and washes them in the kids bath tub.
- The kids, especially my 9 year old, is always wondering what kind of mood Nana is in at the moment.
- She is so loud it's incredibly annoying.
- She stays in her room all of the time, saying she's depressed or her back hurts so she can't do anything.
- She say's she's looking for a job, but isn't.
- Her kids (including my husband) are scared of hurting her feelings so they haven't had a serious conversation with her.

Just a couple more things I am going to stop my rant.. for now.

She has three dogs. She keeps the dogs in 'her' room (my old office) all day except when she takes them out to go to the bathroom twice a day. Other than that the poor dogs are in her room all day. We won't let them run around because when she first moved in, they left surprises behind and she can't seem to train them.

She doesn't play with the kids. She puts them in front of the TV. Her idea of babysitting (which we've only had her do twice maybe) is to rent movies and 'have a fun time watching telly'.
UGHH. I hate seeing the kids in front of the TV. They look like little zombies when they are watching TV.

She talks like a baby saying things like "I misseded you" to the kids. What the heck does misseded mean and what is 'telly'?

There is so much more I can say and maybe I will a little later, in part 2!

She is really wearing on my nerves and with working from home, caring for two kids, cleaning, cooking, helping with homework, phone calls, etc. Besides feeling like my feelings and issues with the situation don't matter at all, I don't need this extra stress. Who does?

I need some xanax please!